He held the coffee cup like it might answer his prayer. Swirling it once, then twice, he finally asked, “How do I know this relationship honors God?”
I smiled gently. He wasn’t asking if she was nice or beautiful or even if they had fun together. He was asking the question more of us should: What does God think of the way I date?
The Bible never uses the word “dating.” But it speaks deeply to those who are dating—with all its excitement, confusion, and ache to be loved in return. We see it, for example, in 1 Corinthians 10:31: “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” And in Song of Songs 2:7, where the bride pleads, “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.”
One verse reminds us of purpose. The other, of patience.
If you're looking for a detailed manual about dating, you won’t find it in Scripture. But if you’re searching for how to love well, wait wisely, and walk in trust—you’ll find God has never been silent.
The problem, I think, isn’t that God hasn’t spoken. It’s that we don’t always want to listen—at least, not to those particular verses.
It’s hard to hear “do it all for the glory of God” when we’re caught up in butterflies and text messages that make us smile. And it’s even harder to hear “don’t arouse love too soon” when loneliness has crept in like a quiet thief at night. Maybe you’ve felt that too. The pull between wanting love now and longing to be spiritually grounded before it begins.
I once mentored a young woman named Sarah who had grown tired of waiting. She was tired of praying. Tired of guarding her heart. “Everyone else is dating,” she said. “Why not me?” So when a guy showed interest, she said yes quickly—even when his words were careless, his heart far from God.
Over time, Sarah began to lose parts of herself. Her faith, gently pushed aside. Her peace, slowly replaced with anxiety. She wasn’t in sin, per se, but she was running ahead of God—and it showed.
One night, after a painful breakup, she showed up at my door with tears no boy could have healed. “I feel like I gave away the story God was writing for me,” she whispered.
Stories don’t always need rewriting. Sometimes, they need surrendering.
That’s what 1 Corinthians 10:31 is about. Whether you're dating, waiting, or wondering—you do it all, every part of it, in a way that reflects the beauty of Christ. You ask, “Would Jesus be at home in this conversation? In this relationship? In this pace we’re moving?”
And Song of Songs gives us another pearl of wisdom: desire has a right time—and love hurries it at its own risk. The verse isn’t just poetic—it’s protective. Waiting isn’t passive; it’s powerful. It says, “I'm not withholding love—I’m preparing for it.”
Dating with purpose isn’t about having a perfect checklist or even a perfect person. It’s about seeking God first and letting your love life grow from what’s already rooted in Him. Glorifying Him in your dating means you’re not using people to fill an empty space. You’re inviting Him to be in the center of it all.
If that sounds too holy for a modern world—remember, holiness isn’t outdated. It’s timeless. And so is God’s wisdom.
When the dates go well or when the phone stays silent. When you ache to not eat dinner alone again. When your prayers for someone to do life with feel stuck in heaven’s mailbox. Even then, your waiting is not wasted.
Dating might not be in the Bible, but foundations are. Character is. Purity is. Wisdom is. And so is joy. Because the God who says, “Don’t awaken love before it’s ready,” is the same God who says, “I have plans to prosper you.” That’s not courtroom advice—it’s covenant love.
So if you’re dating—or dreaming of it—take His hand first. Let God be the one who sets the pace, who checks your motivations, who whispers, “Not yet,” when your heart pleads, “But I’m ready.”
There’s beauty in that kind of trust.
And maybe the best love stories begin with, “Whatever I do, Lord, I want it to glorify You.”
He held the coffee cup like it might answer his prayer. Swirling it once, then twice, he finally asked, “How do I know this relationship honors God?”
I smiled gently. He wasn’t asking if she was nice or beautiful or even if they had fun together. He was asking the question more of us should: What does God think of the way I date?
The Bible never uses the word “dating.” But it speaks deeply to those who are dating—with all its excitement, confusion, and ache to be loved in return. We see it, for example, in 1 Corinthians 10:31: “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” And in Song of Songs 2:7, where the bride pleads, “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.”
One verse reminds us of purpose. The other, of patience.
If you're looking for a detailed manual about dating, you won’t find it in Scripture. But if you’re searching for how to love well, wait wisely, and walk in trust—you’ll find God has never been silent.
The problem, I think, isn’t that God hasn’t spoken. It’s that we don’t always want to listen—at least, not to those particular verses.
It’s hard to hear “do it all for the glory of God” when we’re caught up in butterflies and text messages that make us smile. And it’s even harder to hear “don’t arouse love too soon” when loneliness has crept in like a quiet thief at night. Maybe you’ve felt that too. The pull between wanting love now and longing to be spiritually grounded before it begins.
I once mentored a young woman named Sarah who had grown tired of waiting. She was tired of praying. Tired of guarding her heart. “Everyone else is dating,” she said. “Why not me?” So when a guy showed interest, she said yes quickly—even when his words were careless, his heart far from God.
Over time, Sarah began to lose parts of herself. Her faith, gently pushed aside. Her peace, slowly replaced with anxiety. She wasn’t in sin, per se, but she was running ahead of God—and it showed.
One night, after a painful breakup, she showed up at my door with tears no boy could have healed. “I feel like I gave away the story God was writing for me,” she whispered.
Stories don’t always need rewriting. Sometimes, they need surrendering.
That’s what 1 Corinthians 10:31 is about. Whether you're dating, waiting, or wondering—you do it all, every part of it, in a way that reflects the beauty of Christ. You ask, “Would Jesus be at home in this conversation? In this relationship? In this pace we’re moving?”
And Song of Songs gives us another pearl of wisdom: desire has a right time—and love hurries it at its own risk. The verse isn’t just poetic—it’s protective. Waiting isn’t passive; it’s powerful. It says, “I'm not withholding love—I’m preparing for it.”
Dating with purpose isn’t about having a perfect checklist or even a perfect person. It’s about seeking God first and letting your love life grow from what’s already rooted in Him. Glorifying Him in your dating means you’re not using people to fill an empty space. You’re inviting Him to be in the center of it all.
If that sounds too holy for a modern world—remember, holiness isn’t outdated. It’s timeless. And so is God’s wisdom.
When the dates go well or when the phone stays silent. When you ache to not eat dinner alone again. When your prayers for someone to do life with feel stuck in heaven’s mailbox. Even then, your waiting is not wasted.
Dating might not be in the Bible, but foundations are. Character is. Purity is. Wisdom is. And so is joy. Because the God who says, “Don’t awaken love before it’s ready,” is the same God who says, “I have plans to prosper you.” That’s not courtroom advice—it’s covenant love.
So if you’re dating—or dreaming of it—take His hand first. Let God be the one who sets the pace, who checks your motivations, who whispers, “Not yet,” when your heart pleads, “But I’m ready.”
There’s beauty in that kind of trust.
And maybe the best love stories begin with, “Whatever I do, Lord, I want it to glorify You.”
